Dynasty Warriors DS: Fighter's Battle - The Only Video I Will Ever Record

I gave this game a fair shot. No one ever talks about it but I thought it might at least be as good as the GBA game. I was wrong. First of all, this game is barely a Dynasty Warriors game. You play as one of three characters which do not have actual names but are based off those 4 guardian spirit animals or whatever they're called that Asian culture has. Suzaku, Byakko, Genbu, Seiryu. However since there's only 3 characters to play as I dunno why the hell they based them off those but...whatever. This game clearly had some budget cuts so they probably never got around to making the 4th. Anyways, there's Phoenix, the red character under the Crimson banner. Dragon, the blue character under the Azure banner. And Chimera, the yellow character under the Golden banner. Their banners and symbolism have literally no meaning as this game has no story whatsoever. This game is nothing but a glorified Versus mode, meant for you to fight other players with a copy of the game. As you can see, they already failed at step one because no one fucking bought this game so expecting to have someone else to play with is absolutely absurd. You pick a character and fight one of the others for 11 battles. Whoever takes over the most areas, wins. you won't even see the third character and it's random on who you fight, so you won't be seeing Chimera in this video. You can actually lose a battle and still keep playing, because the game treats fighting the AI as if you were fighting another player. Some people compare this to Empires, but that's an insult to Empires. The only similarity are the fact that you have a map screen and there are bases. In battle, your goal is to take over the enemy bases and then take their main camp before the enemy officer does so to yours. The catch here is that the enemy officer NEVER STOPS RESPAWNING. And trust me, the AI is better at killing your allies than you are killing theirs. As a result you have to keep backtracking across the map to fight them off over and over, elongating these stages. The enemy officer can also respawn randomly, so they can potentially appear right next to your main camp, forcing you to trek across the entire map. You also respawn, but the same goes for you and you can respawn next to the enemy main camp. Which is only bad, because if your main camp is in danger, you have to travel the ENTIRE map to get back to save it. Furthermore, the enemy has access to a lot of special abilities you just outright do not, at least not at the beginning. Some of them are downright infuriating, such as an ability that forces you to watch a whirlwind animation for 15 seconds and then sends you to a random spot on the map and another that can freeze you in place for like half a minute. I'm estimating those times, before anyone watches the videos to correct me like a twat, the point is that it's annoying as shit. Another problem is figuring out where each map section leads to the other. You'd think going right would take you to the area on the right, but no, you have to go DOWN to go right. How do you go left? Also down, but on the leftmost exit. At this point, I dunno how the fuck you go down. This made me waste time not knowing how to get back to my base to protect it several times, which is made even more time consuming as anytime you enter an area you HAVE to defeat a quota of enemies in order to open the gates. Even if said gate leads right to one of your bases or an area you'd already been to. You notice how I haven't mentioned any Dynasty Warriors characters yet? That's because their presence is negligible at best. They only serve as enemy officers to fight or allies to protect bases. They don't do anything except guard bases and have no story relevance whatsoever. Some of them are annoying as hell to fight because they're riding horses and they HAVE to stay on their horses. So when you knock them off, they teleport back on and make it impossible to combo them. The enemy officers can also musou whenever the hell they fell like it and have no charge time before doing so, so it can completely catch you off guard and wreck you before you can even react. The DW characters have their DW5 appearances and take voice clips from that game, however, some of them are cut as you can see characters like Cao Pi were demoted to being generics. Pretty clear indicator that this game was rushed. I uploaded this video with very little editing, just to show exactly what all I did before I decided "yeah, no, fuck this" and that I wasn't going to waste time playing it. I'd have suffered through if there was a unique story like the GBA game had, but there's literally no reason to play this. I'm just putting it up for the sake of marking it off the list of Warriors games for me to play.