27. Double-Dumped - Let's Play Magician's Quest: Mysterious Times

Okay, so we haven't been the best boyfriend... But Mikey and Aurora really let us have it in this episode of Magician's Quest: Mysterious Times with accusations of invalid best friend certification (false, I signed that in my best bodily fluids!) and an existential running in place (true...), and our double-heartbreak is underscored further when we can't activate Mystery Time for approximately the eight-billionth time in a row so that all the old people can give us a dinky 100 Ritch. New year, same constipated stranger occupying the Mystery Toilet on the other side of the door. But things aren't all bad as Suzy announces her leave of Frogtrap and also that she lost five pounds, surely in a PR-motivated exit after the recent questioning about her weight by Mikey (after all, she has an idol's reputation to maintain); she even lends us her bass-playing chops for one last killer jam (or two) as we get our rage about our technical and relationship issues with Scream (Mis-)Communication (as if she hasn't been musically withholding for most of her tenure at Frogtrap). But our vengeful angst will not be quenched until we make sure Mikey's third monkeypox quarantine comes with an infection of the fungal variety... That'll teach Mikey when we take shit, we give shiitake right back! Meanwhile, in a brilliant move to kick of the Year of the Rabbit, Naomi tries to shift the heat for her demonic ways onto innocent dumpling Sammy... or has she inculcated a penguin youngin' into her evil ranks? Stay tuned to (maybe) find out!